— i am my own ghost.

act 1 [i hate myself]: hotel california - city of tears
act 2 [i am this way]: city of tears - quiet water
act 3 [new friends, same old]: mirror master - redesign your logo

key: ☺ - :) | ✾ - emotions | ☾ - crais | ✢ - victor

hotel california (2013 remaster) - the eagles - 6:31 ☺

[welcome to evenfall. enjoy your stay!]

on a dark desert highway
cool wind in my hair
warm smell of colitas
rising up through the air
up ahead in the distance
i saw a shimmering light
my head grew heavy and my sight grew dim
i had to stop for the night

there she stood in the doorway
i heard the mission bell
and i was thinkin' to myself
"this could be heaven or this could be hell"
then she lit up a candle
and she showed me the way
there were voices down the corridor
i thought i heard them say

"welcome to the hotel california
such a lovely place
such a lovely face
plenty of room at the hotel california
any time of year
you can find it here"

so i called up the captain
"please bring me my wine"
he said, "we haven't had that spirit here
since nineteen sixty-nine"
and still those voices are callin'
from far away
wake you up in the middle of the night
just to hear them say

"welcome to the hotel california
such a lovely place
such a lovely face
they livin' it up at the hotel california
what a nice surprise
bring your alibis"

mirrors on the ceiling
the pink champagne on ice, and she said
"we are all just prisoners here
of our own device"
and in the master's chambers
they gathered for the feast
they stab it with their steely knives
but they just can't kill the beast

last thing i remember, i was running for the door
i had to find the passage back to the place i was before
"relax," said the night man, "we are programmed to receive"
"you can check out any time you like but you can never leave!"
 

fallen down - toby fox - 0:57 ☺

:)  

amnesia was her name - lemon demon - 4:03 ☺

amnesia was her name, she had beautiful eyes
and every word she said, it was a little surprise

can’t remember when i realized i was in love
(la-la-love)
can’t remember who it was i was thinking of

dr. amnesia was her name, she had beautiful eyes

can’t remember how she smiled when she said my name
(what’s my name?)
can’t remember, cause my heart jumped and hit my brain

and i can’t recall that special way
she told me each and every day
her name
i can’t recall the fact that i always said i loved her back
the same way, every time the same

the doctor said that i had beautiful eyes
(all right)

amnesia was her name, she had memory loss
(no, wait)
well, every word i said, it was a little surprise—ing
(all right)
and every word she said didn’t make it across

can’t remember when we walked past the o.r. sign
(surgery)
can’t remember passing out with her hand in mine
(my-my-mind)
i remember waking up with my mind repaired
(a-okay!)
i remember when i realized she wasn’t there
 
 
 
 

everybody loves me - onerepublic - 3:38 ☺ ✾

well, hail caesar, shadow in my backseat
and her friends are standing right in front of me
world wide from the cimarron to turkey
open up, said everybody loves me

and you don't have to make a sound
they got what you need
what you need
make you say

oh my!
feels just like i don't try
looks so good i might die
all i know is everybody loves me
head down
swaying to my own sound
flashes in my face now
all i know is everybody loves me
everybody loves me
everybody, everybody, oh
everybody, everybody!
 

bells in santa fe - halsey - 3:37 ✾

[find your name. reject your nature.]

don't call me by my name
all of this is temporary
watch as i slip away for your sake
all of this is temporary

better off dead, so i reckon i'm headed to hell instead

jesus needed a three-day weekend
to sort out all his bullshit
figurе out the treason
i've been sеarching for a fortified defense
four to five reasons

i don't really mean it 'cause who the fuck would choose this?

well, maybe i could hold you in the dark
you won't even notice me depart

leavin' through the door without a word
you won't even notice, little bird

so don't wait for me, don't wait for me, wait-ah
it's not a happy ending
don't wait for me, don't wait for me, wait-ah
it's not a happy ending

all of this is temporary
all of this is temporary
all of this is temporary
all of this is temporary
all of this is temporary
all of this is temporary
all of this is—
 

hand me my shovel, i'm going in! - will wood and the tapeworms - 5:51 ✾ ☺

[how long can they reject their nature before it kills them?]

my heart was stolen by a blind pickpocket
in the deep city streets in the summer of 2012
and i never even saw her face
my dreams were shattered like a stained glass window
jesus in pieces, i believe i threw a brick right through him
but my memory could not be saved

take the road on higher ground
and tell me “don’t look down! you’ll fall and break your back”
but that just reminds me how there’s more to be found beneath the black

this is not enough, this is not enough to prove it yet
no, i need to hit the bottom
this is not enough, this is not enough to prove it yet
no, i need to hit the bottom

gotta get to the bottom of this
gotta get to the bottom of this
gotta get to the bottom of this
take you with me

when too much is not enough there’s plenty
more where that came from around

looking up we see the point of entry
between where we are and we’ve been
looking up i could say heaven sent me
hand me my shovel, i’m going in
looking up we see the point of entry
between where we are and we’ve been
looking down i could say heaven sent me
hand me my shovel, i’m going in!

gotta get to the bottom of this
gotta get to the bottom of this
gotta get to the bottom of this
if it kills me...

this is not enough, this is not enough, not enough to prove it yet
no, i need to hit the bottom
this is not enough, this is not enough, not enough to prove it yet
no, i need to hit the bottom
 

city of tears - christopher larkin - 2:58

[this is The fern song. you understand. reblog]
 

i heard the same birds as you in exile - hot sugar - 4:36

[mostly on here for the title. song itself is just ok]
 

teenage birdsong - four tet - 3:25

[bird song 2. a bop]
 

new beginning (instrumental) - maduk - 4:09 ✾

[an abstraction]
 

where the sun beats - blue sky black death - 4:45

[i dont have any commentary for this one sorry]
 

waterfall - toby fox - 2:06

[ah, the water themes. not sure what to do with those but they are a vibe]
 

in iolite - ghost - 4:38 ✾

「ただいま」と戻って     "tadaima" to modotte
そばに行って     soba ni itte
ストップライトで止まって     sutoppuraito de tomatte
言いたいこと     iitai koto

朝まで寝ない     asa made nenai
空色見て     sorairo mite
ただの年だけ     tada no toshi dake
ここから出すよ     koko kara dasu yo

バックロードで躊躇う     bakkuroodo de tamerau
またある     mata aru
君は亀裂でステップのは     kimi wa kiretsu de suteppu no wa
したくなかった     shitaku nakatta

ここから出す     koko kara dasu yo

アイオライトにまだいる     aioraito ni mada iru
アイオライトに君の戻る     aioraito ni kimi no modoru
アイオライトにまだいる     aioraito ni mada iru
君と会う時までずっと     kimi to au toki made zutto

ライフラインで掛かるのは     raifurain de kakaru no wa
あの心     ano kokoro
もうここに泊まる     mou koko ni tomaru
ちょっと進むすぎる     chotto susumu sugiru

朝まで寝ない     asa made nenai
空色見て     sorairo mite
ただの年だ     tada no toshi da
ここから出す     koko kara dasu

アイオライトに待ってた     aioraito ni matteta
君と会う時までずっと     kimi to au toki made zutto

別の今日     betsu no kyou
別の年と     betsu no toshi to
千の昨日     sen no kinou
と別の千くる     to betsu no sen kuru
ここにある     koko ni aru
ああ...
 

living mice - c418 - 2:57

[all of this is temporary...]
 

sleepless nights - crusherp - 3:41 ✾

[...all of this is temporary...]

ooh, there's something
about the way that i feel
when i look up and see
the signs and the screens
that happen to hide me
in plain sight, unnoticed

there's something
about the way that i am
when i look at myself

there's something that guides me
alone, but not lonely
missing, intentionally

if i have to confess
if i have to admit
if i had a choice
this is how i would live
there's a kind of comfort
a kind of comfort
in the night, as it is
i see the reflection
of neon signs in your eyes
that's how i know i'm not alone
'cuz out in the city,
there's lots of people just like me
 

resurrections - lena raine - 9:38

[...all of this is temporary...]
 

quiet water - toby fox - 0:32

[...all of this is-]
 

mirror master - young the giant - 4:09 ☺

[you are now a player character. have fun :) !]

look in the mirror
familiar figure
staring right back at me
split decision
now my reflection's talking
but i didn't speak
he said oh my god you're piecing it together
you are just a shadow of me
oh my lord you've never left the mirror
you were never ever free
but tonight you will play the tambourine

take in the vision
my imperfections shatter in the mirror in me
another shadow slips in to the chateau
hoping that i cannot see
i said oh my god i'm piecing it together
you were just a memory
oh my lord you never left the mirror
you were never ever free
but tonight you will play the tambourine

you will be the chosen master
you will leave with the girl this time
you will be the leading actor
movie of your own design
and when you hit disaster
the answer will be yours to find
you're the mirror's master
now forever i'm resigned

'cause now forever i'm resigned
now forever i'm resigned
 

haunted house - dbmk - 2:49 ✢

[specifically about the first convo they and victor had alone & the ensuing outing of their nature]

watch your tone
don't forget you only know what i have shown you

tell me where you're at and where you're going
move a little slow when you—
tell me where you're at and where you’re going
i move a little slow when you cut me open

i burn through
glowing in the dark for you
and i'm bleeding but i—
i won't move
so come and find me
if you want me to burn then ignite me
 

first steps - lena raine - 3:38 ✾

[having fun yet?]
 

uwa!! so temperate♫ - toby fox - 0:56

[toby why'd u call it that ._.]
 

dusk stars - alex holowka - 6:37

[fernvibes]
 

darkness falls - toby fox - 1:06

[this is not about the tapestry its about the song's vibes]
 

everything stays - adventure time - 1:35 ☾

let's go in the garden
you'll find something waiting
right there where you left it lying upside down
when you finally find it
you'll see how it's faded
the underside is lighter when you turn it around

everything stays right where you left it
everything stays, but it still changes
ever so slightly
daily and nightly
in little ways
when everything stays
 

ラグトレイン - inabakumori - 4:11 ☾ ✾ ✢

[my favorite interpretation of this song is that it is about grief]

夕方と退屈のお誘いを断って     yuugata to taikutsu no osasoi o kotowatte
一人きり 路地裏は決して急がないで     hitorikiri rojiura wa kesshite isoganaide
ほら 横断歩道も待ってくれと言ってる     hora oudan hodou mo matte kure to itteru
見張る街角があなたを引き留めてく     miharu machikado ga anata o hikitometeku

夕方の駅のホームはひどく混み合って     yuugata no eki no hoomu wa hidoku komiatte
ひとり占めできるまで休憩して欲しくて     hitorijime dekiru made kyuukei shite hoshikute
また 集団下校があなたを急かしている     mata shuudan gekou ga anata o sekashite iru
ほら 自動改札は待ってくれと言ってる     hora jidou kaisatsu wa matte kure to itteru
塞がる両手があなたを引き留めてく     fusagaru ryoute ga anata o hikitometeku

あがいた夢を捨てて     agaita yume o sutete
揺れる今日は眠って誤魔化せ     yureru kyou wa nemutte gomakase
失くした言葉を知らないなら     nakushita kotoba o shiranai nara
各駅停車に乗り込んで     kakueki teisha ni norikonde

離れた街と街を繋ぐ列車が     hanareta machi to machi o tsunagu ressha ga
呼んだ風に飛ばされないでいてくれ     yonda kaze ni tobasarenaide ite kure
失くした言葉はそのままでいいよ     nakushita kotoba wa sono mama de ii yo
揺れる列車に身を任せて欲しいから     yureru ressha ni mi o makasete hoshii kara

離れ離れの街を...     hanarebanare no machi o...

離れ離れの街を     hanarebanare no machi o
繋ぐ列車は行ってしまったね     tsunagu ressha wa itte shimatta ne
失くした言葉を知らないなら     nakushita kotoba o shiranai nara
ポケットで握りしめて     poketto de nigirishimete

あがいた息を捨てて     agaita iki o sutete
延びる今日は眠って誤魔化せ     nobiru kyou wa nemutte gomakase
失くした言葉を知らないなら     nakushita kotoba o shiranai nara
各駅停車で旅をして     kakueki teisha de tabi o shite
 

digital girl - kira - 3:02 ☺

[the "fuck being your friend" song. as always, it's a metaphor]

hello, nice to meet ya
my name is perfection

but sometimes i do- don't you?
think of the things they told you
there must be more than this
there must be more than what you know too
i wasn't made to feel
but lately i can't help it
if there's a way out of here...
i've got an idea!

break it all down
i'll make you come around
i'll burn this whole facade to the ground!

so i woke up with a headache today
just kidding, i don't feel pain
and to be honest i don't even gotta sleep
and that's the difference between you and me
and i know, i know, i know, i know, everybody wants it
'til they gotta commit
looking through my eyes, change your mind so quick
you won't believe the shit i've seen and
no day is like the other
be anything i wanna

but i feel something inside of my heart
and it's begging me to go before i fall apart

what is yours and what is mine?
am i ever gonna die?
please don't uninstall my love
please don't uninstall my life

break it all down
i'll make you come around
i'll burn this whole facade to the ground!
i'm so sick of windows
i need something physical
hah, tough luck in a digital world!
whine about your issues
what your life has come to
sure, alright, i got it, poor you!
how do you think i feel?
none of this is real!
singing "ahh, life sucks as a digital girl!"
 

bury a friend - billie eilish - 3:13 ✢ ☾ ✾

say it, spit it out
what is it exactly?

today, i'm thinkin' about
the things that are deadly
the way i'm drinkin' you down
like i wanna drown
like i wanna end me

keep you in the dark
what had you expected?

i'll meet you in the park
i'll be calm and collected

it's probably somethin' that shouldn't be said out loud
honestly, i thought that i would be dead by now
(oh wow)
calling security, keepin' my head held down
bury the hatchet or bury a friend right now

'cause i can't say no, no, i can't say no
then my limbs all froze and my eyes won't close
and i can't say no, i can't say no

(careful)

step on the glass
staple your tongue
bury a friend,
try to wake up

bury a friend,
i wanna end me

what do you want from me?
why don't you run from me?
what are you wondering?
what do you know?
why aren't you scared of me?
why do you care for me?
when we all fall asleep
where do we go?
 

androgyne - quartango - 4:29 ✾

[ :( ]
 

redesign your logo - lemon demon - 4:20 ☺

[friendly once more :) !]

redesign your logo
we know what we're doing
we are here to help you
everything's connected

here we have a circle
smooth and inoffensive
this will be the basis
for your revolution

everyone will see it
every demographic
if they fail to see it
are they even human?

everyone will see it
every demographic!

think about it this way:
guided evolution
this will be a new breed:
cutting edge, but classic
fully complimentary
bold and self-sufficient

when the logo's finished
then we will unveil it
seven billion people
instantly enlightened
everyone's rebranded
all the fighting's over
say goodbye to conflict
that design's rejected

there's no longer language
only recognition
there's no longer country
only corporate colors
color makes us hungry
hunger makes us human
everyone can see it
everything's connected